Sometimes I want to cry

Sometimes I want to break down and cry.

There are times that I feel like a fraud in my work and my life

But I don’t want to let down my kids or my wife.

There’s pain everywhere, some we see, most we don’t

Some will seek help but sadly most won’t

We hide well behind an “everything’s fine”

And it leaves us to wonder, was that for your benefit or mine.

We fear for our future and that of our kids,

We fear that if it’s screwed up, it’s because of something we did

We fill time with busy work and lessons and meetings

We kill time with booze and TV and far too much eating.

I know that I love my family, my church and my God.

And especially those friends with a heartfelt, knowing nod.

I’m guarded and protective of all that is me

Would they all still stick by if they could really see.

I’m listening and reading and learning more every day

I’m trying to be more open so I just have to say

Sometimes, I just want to cry.